JCOHS Lawyers and Attorneys

posted by Law Help on Aug 27

As much as lawmakers try to fit marriage into a set of rules, there’s no universal answer to whether or not a couple should go their separate ways. No two marriages are alike, and the circumstances surrounding a strained relationship—and potential divorce—can vary a great deal. However, for practical purposes, experts have laid down a set of rules to help couples decide when to divorce—and when it’s worth staying until things smoothen out.

One good way to tell if you should divorce is to look at the big picture. Ten years from now, do you see yourself overcoming your problems and putting the past behind? It’s all hypothetical, but the way you picture things in the future says a lot about how they are today. If you can’t imagine either party agreeing to compromise, it shows a lack of willingness to keep the relationship going. And if that’s the case, it’s probably not worth staying.

This approach isn’t all that reliable, however. Your outlook may be influenced by your emotions at the moment—and you know what they say about making decisions when you’re angry. Right after an argument is the worst time to bring up divorce. Give yourself time to cool down—for some people, this can take as long as a week—and then discuss things calmly with your partner. You may feel very strongly about divorce at the moment, but you’d be surprised at how a good night’s sleep can change your views.

Take the time to write down all the things you’re unhappy with. In many cases, relationship problems are the product of several small things that seem insurmountable when added up, but can actually be solved individually. For example, you may be unhappy with the fact that your partner smokes, doesn’t spend enough time with the kids, and spends too much time at work. It sounds bad, but all it may take is some moral support for kicking the habit and good time management.

One thing’s for sure: you should never decide to divorce without trying to fix the problem. You can only make the final call if you’ve tried everything you can to make the relationship work, but still feel like you’re on the losing end. Going to court is a last resort, not a frontline solution. And although divorce can be initiated by just one party, ideally the decision is made by both, or at least discussed beforehand.

posted by madamejune on Jul 6

In Virginia, as in many other states, a spouse can file a divorce with or without the consent of the other. All that’s required is that at least one spouse and at least one witness can testify to the basis of divorce. There are six grounds for divorce in Virginia, which be used by anyone who has lived in the state at least six months before the filing. These grounds are:

Separation: This means that the couple has not lived together for at least one year. Also known as a “no fault” divorce, this is among the most common reasons for divorce in the U.S and the most widely used in Virginia.

Adultery: A spouse can file for divorce if the other is proven to have committed adultery within the last five years. This can be hard to prove in court, however. In addition, for it to be valid the spouse filing the divorce should not have continued to live with his or her partner after finding out about the adultery.

Felony: If a spouse has been convicted of a felony and confined in a federal or state facility for more than a year, his or her partner can file for divorce.

Desertion and separation: This means that the spouse left the home for no rational reason, with no apparent intent of returning, and lived apart for at least a year. This does not include walking out of a marriage because of spousal abuse—this situation is covered in different grounds.

Cruelty and separation: A spouse who has been abused physically, mentally, or emotionally can file for divorce, but as with desertion, the couple must not have lived together for at least one year.

Separation for six months: A couple who has been apart for at least six months can file under these grounds only if they have no children under 18 years old, and if both spouses have entered a property settlement agreement in writing.

The term “separation” here often leads people to think that it requires a special court process. For purposes of divorce in Virginia, a couple simply has to stop living together to be considered separated. A rare kind of divorce, known as Bed and Board divorce, officially separates a husband and wife but does not allow them to remarry. This applies on the grounds of desertion or abandonment, or fear of cruelty (the spouse seriously expects to be harmed). The divorce can be made final and absolute after the Bed and Board ruling has been in effect for one year.

posted by madamejune on Apr 24

In what might be the least welcome effect of the U.S. economic recovery, the number of divorce filings in the country is climbing back up, according to a Financial Times article last week.

The percentage of people aged 15 and up who were classified as divorced fell from 9.9% in 2006 to 9.7% in 2009, according to the U.S. Census Bureau. More than half of the members of the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers (AAML) saw business slow down in 2009, according to the group’s most recent survey. Today, law firms are reporting increases in business as high as 25%.

The surge is attributed to lower unemployment and an improved (albeit still weak) housing market, which means that people can again afford attorney’s fees and other associated costs. The average cost of divorce in the U.S. is $15,000, according to About.com guide Cathy Meyer.

Many couples opted to stay married during the recession because they were out of work or unable to sell their houses. As a result, according to Las Vegas marriage attorney Marshal Willick, demand built up and the cases are rushing back in.

Willick is among thousands of divorce lawyers now dealing with an influx of clients. South Dakota lawyer Linda Lea Vilken, president of the AAML, said her practice was 25% more active than this time in 2009.

One of her clients first came to her in 2008, but had to put off the divorce because he could not get the loan he needed to buy out his wife’s share of their ranch. Corn and wheat prices have since gone up, according to Vilken, which led to rising property values. The divorce is now moving steadily forward, she said.

Lawyers say the conflicts have also shifted, reflecting changes in couples’ priorities. Willick’s clients are no longer keen on keeping the house, arguing instead about who’s “stuck” with the depreciating property. Most of the homes in question are underwater, meaning its value is less than what is owed on it. Judges are therefore unsure whether to classify it as an asset or a liability.

Another lawyer, Gary Silverman, spoke of a case where the wife wanted to keep the house while the husband preferred to sell. As the fight drew on, the home’s value kept falling, and the divorce remains unsettled, Silverman said.

Other lawyers tell of couples who fight over the smallest of responsibilities, such as making prints of family photos. Some see their plans go down the drain as their investments fall or turn out to be scams, according to other lawyers.

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